Stupid stupid purchase...

I really love to cook. And, the past six months I've taken it to a new level. Every Sunday morning while doing laundry I pour over my cookbooks and decide the week's menu. I make my grocery list accordingly and then skip joyfully to the store, eager to squeeze and smell all the potential vegetables, fruits and and meats. (No, I don't squeeze the meats.)

Well, Oliver is now 4.5 months old. And this past week, I've noticed whenever I eat or drink anything he stares at me with huge and curious eyes. It's almost like he's saying, "Heeeey Mama...Gimme some eggs! Hand me some chicken! Toss me some carrots!" In fact, he looks at me so longingly that I've started to feel badly eating in front of him. So, last Thursday I asked Oliver's pediatrician if I could give him some food. He's clearly showing an interest and let's face it, the taste of milk 24/7 has got to be getting old by now. In a word, he told me no. Apparently a baby shouldn't eat solids until they're 6 months old because their digestive system just isn't ready yet. He told me the longer I waited, the healthier his gut would be. Okay. Fine. I can totally wait.

But that doesn't mean I can't prepare.

This past weekend, Brett, Oliver and I went to look at high chairs. We're now deciding between the Stokke Tripp Trap and the Svan High Chair. Both chairs are modern looking and can be pulled up to the dinner table so we can eat as a family. After high chairs I browsed for sippy cups and baby spoons. And that's when I spotted a cookbook called Top 100 Baby Purees. Well, I thought, this is a fantastic idea! I'll totally make Oliver's food. How hard could it be? I must get this book!

Well, I'm pissed.

Once again, I feel like the marketers of the baby universe have convinced me to buy yet another totally stupid and unnecessary item. (Don't get me started on the organic mattress I bought for Oliver's crib. It weights 5000 lbs and has become the biggest pain in the ass I've ever dealt with in my life.)

I actually spent money on a cookbook that has recipes like this:



Banana:
Mash a small banana with a fork.
Add a little milk.





Avacado:
Cut a small avocado in half.
Take out pit.
Mash.
Add a little milk.




Papaya:
Cut in half.
Take out seeds.
Mash.
Add Milk.

The kicker was this one:

Banana, Avacado and Papaya:
1/2 banana
1/2 Avacado
1/2 Papaya
Mash all together.
Add a little milk.

REALLY??? Fine. Those are the no-cook recipes...but the carrot one is basically the same thing:



Carrots:
Peel and chop 4-6 carrots.
Steam for 15-20 minutes.
Put in blender and puree.
Add a little milk to desired consistency.




To be fair, those are baby's first foods. So obvioulsy I'm not adding spices like basil or rosemary or doing anything crazy. These recipes WILL probably taste better and be more economical than the mushy bland crap baby food sold at grocery stores. But really? Someone wrote and published a cookbook with those recipes? Can someone please get me the number of Random House? I'd like to publish a book on how to change a diaper. I see it going something like this:



Diaper:
1- Put baby on changing table.
2- Take old diaper off.
3- Wipe baby's behind.
4- Put on new diaper.




I may have to wait a month and a half to prove my culinary prowess to Oliver, but in the meantime, I'm going to continue practicing my brownie recipe on Brett and myself.

The cookbook's getting returned today.


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