Feb 6, 2009

Facebook and those damn 25 things...

I'm sure most of you reading this have a Facebook account. 

And, not only do you have Facebook accounts, but I'm sure by now, most of you have been tagged in that crazy 25 Random things I don't know about you game that's been going around the past couple of weeks.  

It's so huge that even the NYtimes did an article on it yesterday!  

Here are mine:

1- I have a love/hate relationship with NYC. I love the food, shops and people. I hate the rents, subway and people.

2- I believe all stuffed animals have feelings. Even the ugly ones.

3- I think all women could use a little make-up. It's not really that big of a deal to put a little effort in.

4- I like getting deep in on the issues both personally and politically.

5- I wanted Oliver to be a girl. When we found out the baby was a boy I cried, even though in my gut I knew all along he was a boy.

6- Pat Benatar's "We Belong" always gets me going.  
Check out her video... it is SO GODDAMN HILARIOUS!

7- S'mores are my all time #1 favorite food. To prove it, we even served them at my wedding.

8- I would move to the Greek Islands in a New York second if my husband was up for it.

9- After reading #8 you should know that feta, olives, tomatoes, olive oil, bread and red wine are things I cannot live without.

10- After ordering out for 4 years, I have rediscovered I am a fabulous cook. Every night as I cook up dinner I amaze myself.  You should see the eggs I make in the morning now. 

11- I think my husband is the best person I know.

12- If I could get into Oliver's crib with him I would.

13- I think doing someone's laundry is the nicest thing anyone can do for you.

14- I will do ANYTHING for a back rub.

15- I loved summer camp and will be thankful for the cult like experience for the rest of my life.

16- I have a full, written out, blown out, financial plan so I'll know exactly what to do with the 25 million dollars I will win one day from the New York State Lottery.

17- My husband made me leave a casino once because I was getting so upset I was losing money. He said I'm never allowed to gamble again because I fundamentally don't understand the odds are against me. 

18- I love, love, love, to read. But I hate, hate, hate chick-lit.

19- Oliver doesn't look like me or Brett. I spend a lot of time wondering who it is he looks like.

20- I'm a tank top, lip gloss and moisturizer junkie. I firmly believe you can't have enough of all three.

21- I hate it when grown women smell like baby powder or wear pigtails. If you're over 18 seriously grow up.

23- You can never stop learning. The day you decide you know it all you've become a moron.

24- I am the worlds best sleeper who can cuddle up to almost anything and make it snuggly.

25- My stuffed animal dog just winked at me.

Feb 5, 2009

It's Greek to me...

So two years ago, Brett and I took the best vacation of our lives. We went to Athens, Mykonos and Santorini. I can't stress enough that every person should visit these places at least once in their lives. Feta cheese and olives truly don't come alive until you eat them here. 

Oh, and the wine is amazing.

Athens was undeniably awe-inspiring. I loved being a tourist here. The Parthenon and Acropolis absolutely blew my mind and I couldn't get over how young the whole concept of America was. I mean, America is seriously like a baby compared to European, Middle Eastern and African countries.

Speaking of babies, it was in Greece that we decided it was time to have one of our own. It actually came up while we were touring the museum at the Parthenon. We were walking through it, taking a break from the outside heat, and looking at all the old amazing tools those smarty pants Greeks came up with.

It was then we saw the Greek solution to potty-training. How cool/uncomfortable does that thing look! Can you imagine putting a squirmy 2 year old on that? Not to mention how cold it must get on his/her poor baby bum sitting on the marble!

But don't you just love that they came up with the idea of potty training?  

Oh, and the wine is amazing.

Feb 4, 2009

Give it to me better...

During my ten years of advertising agency experience I was briefed over and over on the behaviors of a certain target audience companies like Proter & Gamble and Rubbermaid refer to as "CEO of the Household."

The target is always, always, always female. She is 25-40 years old. These women love a good bargain, have big-time brand loyalty, and give new products one chance to make a first impression. If that new toilet wand fails to add anything new or valuable, they will never waste their time or money again. I feel this way about many old boyfriends.

Well, I may not be sitting in my advertising agency office anymore but 4 months ago I became a CEO. Everyday, I walk the aisles of Duane Read, Whole Foods, Babies 'R Us and Bloomies looking for the best deals and the best products to stock my home with. And now, I realize just ineffective advertisers and companies are at reaching me.

Paper towels, toilet paper, dishwasher detergent and cleaning sprays are the four things we use most in our apartment. And frankly, there isn't an ad out there that convinces me to buy one brand over another. I actually choose what I choose because my mother recomended it, my cleaning lady suggested it, or another friend said it saved her life. Yup, that's right, I get what I get because my fellow CEOs have delivered up rave reviews. Yup, my mom whose a woman, my cleaning lady whose a women and other friends who are also women.

My point is women need to get vocal and force businesses to talk to us for realsies if they want to push product in this economy. Give us truth! Find out where I itch and scratch it! I promise I will buy you if you seduce me right! It is downright patronizing to see most of the ads on daytime television. Most of the ads are like stupid one liners. You don't marry that guy. The guy that you end up marrying is the one who captures your heart and soul and becomes your best friend forever!

This commercial from the agency Saatchi & Saactchi from a couple of years ago for Pampers ALWAYS gets me to cry.  I love Pampers and am completely devoted to them. They're the only diaper I'll buy. Besides, they really are the best diaper out there.

And then there's this campaign by Johnson & Johnson.  
Tell me this isn't the complete truth:

Right now my top 5, can't live without drugstore products are:

-Bounty Paper Towels
-Cascade Dishwashing Detergent
-Charmin Ultra-Soft Toilet Paper

What are yours? Should I try anything new?

Leave me a comment, don't be shy!

Feb 3, 2009

Little Big Boy...

I've decided that if Oliver is going to spit up on everything from himself to the kitchen sink, he should pitch in and help, especially with the laundry.

Yes, you are lookin' at darling, 4-month old chunker busting out of our laundry basket. 

Over the past couple weeks I've taken Oliver to a few neighborhood play groups and he's always been the youngest one there. I'm fine with him being the most immature in the group, but the thing that freaks me out is that he's seriously twice or three times the size babies who are months older than he is. 

The mothers look at me and ask me how old he is and their eyebrows fly right through their forehead when they hear how he's just 4 months. Their next question is always, how much does he eat? A lot. He's clearly from my side.

I read on babycenter.com that babies are supposed to double their birthweight by 4 months and triple their weight by the first year. But Oliver tripled his birth weight in only 4 months!

I'm thinking well shit! Its no wonder Oliver's first months were maniacal! He's been going through constant and consistent growth spurts.  Poor little big boy!

I'm thrilled to report the past two weeks he's been soooo much calmer and I'm assuming its because he's finally getting used to his own skin! He must be plateauing. 

At this rate, seeing as we're already in 6-12 month clothes, he's going to be the next Brian Urlacher! 

Feb 2, 2009

Why I hate Beyonce...

I live in Tribeca across the street from a government building.  They can fully see into my apartment and I can fully see into their offices. Only a couple times has this posed a problem since we're out of the apartment while they're at work, and by the time Brett or I come home, they've left for the day.

I know you really shouldn't put a baby in front of a tv, and well, I tried to keep him off it but Oliver like his mama, loves to watch the tube. Every morning, while I'd rather watch the Today Show, I put on VH1 so we have music in the apartment to play to. And well, that's when Beyonce happened.  

Have you seen her latest video for "All the Single Ladies?" She dances, no... she rips it up. And Oliver has an absolute shit fit every time that video comes on. He smiles, screams, laughs and kicks right along with the music.

Well, I was having so much fun watching Oliver kick and dance, I thought maybe if I knew some of the dance, I could make him laugh without the television on . So I rewound our DVR a few... 5... 6... or 9 times and tried to get me some of them Beyonce moves.  

I finally threw in the towel because really, who can move like her and even more so I wanted to shower. I turned around and that's when I saw 4 dickwads in the government building standing in an office window watching me, laughing their asses off.


The only thing I could do was flip them the double bird, grab Oliver and run into the other room.   

Fuck New York and fuck Beyonce.